FIN



But there is suffering in life, and there are defeats. No one can avoid them. But it's better to lose some of the battles in the struggles for your dreams than to be defeated without ever knowing what you're fighting for.

Ben Stein

Game Two

EMERY IS A HERO

The guy dresses like a million bucks, even though he makes less than a million bucks a year.

He crashes hummers, punches out other goalies, and he stood on his head last night to keep Ottawa in the game.

Like I said, he's a hero.

Why do these fellows look cranky?

Their team is down 2-0

What is the solution?

They need to eat their
DIAMOND SHREDDIES

Game One



Great consternation seized on the senators... lest such conspiracies and nightly meetings might be productive of secret treachery and mischief

Livy, History of Rome, Book XXXIX

"On my signal... unleash Spezza"

Trust in Alfie... Sens will prevail!

Thoughts on the 24 Season 6 Finale

How did I feel about it? I was actually a bit pissed at the end. "What a cop-out!" I snorted as the final clock of the season came up. Then I let the ending sink in, and it actually came to make sense. The finale of this season was better than it had any right to be, given what had preceded it. Uneven is the best way I can describe this season of 24. Like the first four episodes of this year, the death of Fayed was just about as intense as anything we have seen on this show, but 24 kinda lost steam again after that as it limped toward a finale. Ultimately, hours 23 and 24 somewhat rehabilitated the show, even though I was secretly hoping that a very-much-alive Tony would show up at the end for the shocker ending that some spoiler sites had been predicting.

What did I like specifically in those last two hours? In particular, I liked the brief “telepathy” shot, between Bauer père and Bauer fils…that was bizarre. There was a good build up of tension up to the climax, followed by the inevitable action set-piece on the oil rig, and the confrontation with not one, but two father figures in Jack's life! I thought the last ten minutes with Jack laying his soul bare to SecDef Heller were particularly powerful. Best of all, the finale tied up most if not all loose threads up from outstanding storylines, laying the groundwork for the “retooled” 24 the producers have been talking about. What will that look like, I wonder? I think you can almost tell, just by looking at the way the season finale played out, who will probably be back, and who probably won’t. Here is where I think we stand for next season, or if you prefer

“if I was a 24 producer, this is how things might go down”:

Jack: potentially suicidal at the moment, apparently. DEFINITELY won’t be working for CTU again… will probably get caught up in some ongoing CTU operation in some other city (producers have hinted that CTU LA, which gets breached more often than the Sabres’ defence, won’t be a factor in next season’s storyline). I know some people think they will be getting rid of CTU altogether, but I doubt it! Bauer without CTU is like Alfredsson without Spezza and Heatley –it just wouldn’t be 24.

Cheng: Hopefully gone. He’s been a thorn in Jack's side for long enough and he's kinda f-ed up now anyway, isn’t he? How do you like your Cheng, Mr. Bauer? Extra Crispy

Audrey and papa Heller: Gone. Their three-season arc has run its course. Jack has let Audrey go… as he should. Please don’t bring this tired character back. Need new love interest! Perhaps…

Marilyn Bauer: I could see her return. There’s definitely some chemistry between her and Jack. And is Josh the new Kim?

Papa Bauer: Nope. Appears to be deceased. I doubt James Cromwell will return.

Bill and Karen: Done like dinner. They won’t be back –Bill should count his lucky stars he survived no less than three seasons on this show, given the fate of his predecessors.

Chloe and Morris: Also finito. Both characters’ storylines have been wrapped up nicely and they should definitely not be reintroduced, or they risk having another “President Logan and Martha” coda that goes nowhere.

President Palmer: Gone for good. And his sister too. PLEASE.

VP Daniels could be the Commander-In-Chief next season (President Palmer having eventually succumbed to his injuries sometime between seasons).

Tom Lennox: Hopefully to return…he was actually one of the few interesting people introduced this season, and as one of the few bits of continuity from season 6, he would be an anchor at the White House, a bit like the Mike Novick character in earlier seasons.

Nadia Yassir: Another little bit of continuity –like Chloe from season 3 to Season 4-- she could realistically be introduced as a transfer to the new CTU from CTU L.A. (Mike Doyle was a transfer from CTU Denver, right?). Hopefully, everyone else would be new AND interesting, unlike Nadia.

Mike Doyle: Minus one eyeball, he can now retire and practice pirate imitations. Alternatively, could be at CTU riding a desk and sporting a cool eyepatch, going out with Nadia, or show up as a cameo, à la embittered Tony Almeida from Season 4. Speaking of…

Tony Almeida: Still dead, potentially resuscitated as a zombie, with Curtis, of course. I can hope, can’t I?

Cameos:

Even though just about everyone has been ruthlessly killed off in recent seasons, thereby depriving us of characters we can be “invested” in, potential non-dead returnees include:

Kate Warner (reunited? She is still the hottest love interest)

Kim Bauer (reconciliation with pops?)

Chase Edmunds (but minus one hand, he wouldn’t be able to team up with Jack in any action scenes)

So basically, Jack, Nadia, and Mike (maybe) would be back at CTU, and Daniels and Lennox at White House. That would be as big a cast change as the one that happened between seasons 3 and 4. Definitely a “fresh start”!

Keep the Faith

To the beards go the victory!

Sens in FIVE.


*****
Monsieur Spielberg, un film avec Tintin....
C'est très cool!

I'm famous for playing make-believe and having someone record it. You should listen to me!

Sometimes I am filled with self-loathing when I realize I am one step removed from a movie-geek. Especially when I visit the fora on sites like AICN, populated as they are with so many misfits and creeps.

Call me an aficionado. I have seen just about everything mainstream made since the seventies worth seeing, and a fair bet of indie stuff besides. But, I could not tell you who the Cinematographer was in Chinatown, nor who wrote the script for C.H.U.D. I simply ain't that invested. To me, most movie geeks come across as sad faux-intellectual posers, trying to ascribe greater significance to the craft of what is essentially a bunch of people pretending to do things while a bunch of other people light and record them. This ain't philosophy or literature, it is make-belief, pumped full of ego and hubris and adrenaline.

That being said, I love movies. I don't mean I appreciate film as an art form. I mean I enjoy watching flicks... the same way some kids enjoy reading comics. As mostly-mindless, but occasionally thought-provoking entertainment. That's why I can't take the people who are involved in this business too seriously... and I certainly don't believe that their success in that medium somehow entitles them to use their public profile as a soapbox to preach to the rest of us about their pet causes.



In that spirit, I generally laugh at the earnest, hypocritical pronouncements of multimillionaire entertainment industry types, and I love seeing something like this: Lewis Black on Earth Day celebrities


Further proof that the stupidity of Cameron Diaz and her ilk truly knows no bounds


*****

Iranian Prez involved in hot porn scandal!

*****

Top 15 unintentionally funny comic book panels "Aunt May should know better than to snoop around a teenage boy's room!"

*****

At the risk of exagerating: Elizabethtown = disaster of mythic proportions

*****

Next in the series: Little Red Riding Hillary and the Big Bad Wolfowitz

*****

The touching tale of Emperor Norton of San Francisco

Peace-Loving Oil Rich Mordor

Removed, because it screws up my blog template! Can be seen at ifilm.com

Michael Moore's searing examination of the Aragorn administration's actions in the wake of the tragic events at Helms Deep.

*****

My Mob Nickname:

James "Chimpy Nuts" Ellard

*****

9 things I learned about the world according to anonymous
stock photo models

*****

Check out who is encased in carbonite

*****

Writing Like an Executive

I'm a Mandarin!

Talent: 23%
Lifer: 59%
Mandarin: 62%

Take the Talent, Lifer, or Mandarin quiz.

*****

I was reading a great blog post by David Thompson on cultural equivalence-- David has a blog that explores comic books and culture-- when I happened across a link to this video:



I remember seeing Jeff Dunham do some pretty tame stuff back in the nineties with characters like Peanut, and the Jalapeno-On-A-Stick... I guess times have changed!

The thing is, Achmed the Dead Terrorist may seem like an edgier act, but is it funnier than the middlebrow schtick that Dunham used to do with Walter the cranky old coot? Braver, sure. Funnier? Debatable.

*****

My Favourite Toronto Star headline. Ever.

*****

I know everyone seems to be blogging... but Val Venis?

Thoughts on Bauer Withdrawal

Apparently while I wasn't paying attention, someone changed the name of this 24 show to "Karen and Bill's Tales of Woe and Misfortune (featuring crazy Audrey Raines)".

A couple of weeks ago I asked for more Bauer, and the producers delivered, but now it would appear we have entered the post-crisis period, which like the post-War period in Britain is marked by rationing. Only in this case, it isn't butter and sugar, but Bauer and shootings that are being rationed.

So Bill and Karen are having marital difficulties now. Yeah, and uh... we care why? Watch for Dr. Phil to make a guest appearance and appeal to the soccer mom demographic. And Audrey has returned.. something that is sure to please those 23 people in the continental United States that loved Kim Raver in
The Nine. Bully for them, but for us 24 fans, if Bill and Karen and Audrey subplots equal less Bauer induced mayhem, then I say bring back one-armed Chase and Kim. I'd rather watch cougars and Mexican subplots that go nowhere than this season's three least compelling characters.

And yet, I won't repeat my earlier mistake and lose faith in my favourite show. Instead, I choose to believe that this is a brief detour on the road to season-ending ass kickery... and the last five minutes of the episode gives us all reason to believe, I think.

Spring Cleaning

Walking the streets of Ottawa yesterday, I was amazed at the effect that the change in weather had had on people. The mercury rises a couple of degrees, and all of a sudden the streets are packed. Because I live just north of Sandy Hill, at the edge of Lowertown, I often walk back from work along Rideau street. It's a fantastic walk, really, because the area around the Byward Market is arguably the most interesting part of town. Yesterday evening it was alive with the sights and sounds of the residents of the National Capital coming out of their long hibernation.

That, more than anything, has convinced me that Spring is finally here. It has been a rough winter, but Nesrine is finishing her courses, and I have begun a new job at PCO, so it really seems that both of us are making a fresh start.

So for the next few days, I'm doing some Spring cleaning on my blog... posting some of the interesting nonsense I've stumbled across and kept in my favourites. Should be fun...

Attention Quebec Separatists

Jon Cassar says YOU may be Jack Bauer's next target

Tabarnac!

Penitence

The last episode of 24 was so good, I hereby renounce my heretical views, and recite the act of 24 contrition:

Oh Mr. Bauer
I am heartily sorry for
having doubted thee,
and I detest my cynicism,
because I dread the loss of 24,
and the pains of reruns;
but most of all because
I offend thee, Jack,
Who doth kick ass
and are deserving of all my love.
I firmly resolve,
with the help of the end-of-season stretch,
to return to the fold
to do penance,
and to believe in thee again.

let us now pause and call to mind he who has suffered for us all...



AMEN!

P.S. I'm sure the Lord has a sense of humour

24 Apostasy

Ok, here we are two thirds of the way through the season, and I'm genuinely starting to waver in my faith. I'm not saying that I have left the church of Bauer, but I must admit I'm starting to flirt with heresy... First of all, where is Jack Bauer? 25 minutes into the last episode, and nary a glimpse of the man! Is this "The Hillary Clinton-approved Ricky Silverspoons leDouche variety hour'? Hells no! This is the "Jack Frickin' Bauer Power Hour"! So the producers better make with the Jack Bauer killery and murderistic brutality that is the show's hallmark.

The problem, I think, is that they are focusing on the wrong plot threads:

Anything at CTU? Mostly blows this season, except for Chloe (who is also getting less screentime), and anyone who goes out and gets brutalized, like when Milo and Morris had to take their medicine -- that was good. Putting characters in peril is guaranteed drama, because given the history of 24 supporting character kill-offs, you really never know if they are going to make it out alive.

Nadia? irrelevant eyecandy; zero chemistry with Milo --Tony and Michelle they are not.

Bill Buchanan? Waste of skin. We don't care that you and your wife miss each other. A nuke went off today. Do your bloody job.

I picture the scenario not so long ago: Some 24 writer bursts into a producer's office and says: Wait, I've got an idea! Let's drop a number of intriguing plot threads (papa Bauer, the fate of the former Prez and first lady) just so we can resurrect the most reviled character from the begining of the season. Sandra Palmer, enter stage left, sans muslim boyfriend.

So now we have episodes of boring White House Bunker nonsense as weak president and annoying sister square off against a scenery-chomping Veep and his nefarious aide. At least Karen Hayes and dude from Ally McBeal, both of them fairly interesting characters, are making the best of a bad situation.... 25th amendment...rehashed plot much? I liked this story the first time around, when they did the screw job on Wayne's big brother in season 2.

The last 10 minutes the last night's episode (excluding the insane presidential about-face) reminded everyone of this show's true strength. It is always at its best when it is squarely focused on JACK, and JACK's immediate adversaries, not the political machinations that form the expository backdrop to the narrative. The Ruskie selling out Abu Fayed was classic! Now THAT is the kind of twist we have come to expect.

OK, I'll admit it

I actually fell for this April Fool story:

Ben Mulroney to Run in Papineau for the Conservatives

After all, if one pretty-boy dilettante can enter politics on little more than the strength of his old man's brand, what's to stop another?

Feeling Bastardish?

Here's a good site for the crusty curmudgeons:

101 people who are screwing up Canada

The blog is not really that original: the idea is an "homage" to this book, but that doesn't make it any less relevant or entertaining.

This Spinks guy really spews some venom on alot of Canadian icons, many of whom had it coming --Boisclair comes immediately to mind. Have a read-through, and see how many of the takedowns you find yourself nodding at.

Facebook

I bit the bullet. I'm on it, and guess what? It's kinda cool. Look me up. I've also got a feed from this blog, so you can read my demented ramblings on my Facebook page, and see the stuff that has caught my eye.

Like:

The Story of Canada's original "unofficial" national anthem

A beginner's guide to hosses... not horses, pilgrim, I said HOSSES.

The Anti-Hoss... who would have thunk he had an MA?

Potter offers a dissenting opinion on the joyous new era that pundits claim the rise of the ADQ has ushered in: Potter Gold is another good blog from the people that brought you Inkless Wells.

Saw 300, loved it. If you did too, you might find this interesting

My morning smile

Don Martin on the Budget:

My francophone colleagues had a good guffaw when they spotted the title of the budget document. It's "Aspire," as in to strive for greatness. In French it means "suck," as in draining the federal treasury of more than its share of the spending surge.

Aspire: the theme for Budget 2007
Perspire: what the thought of a Spring election makes the opposition do.

Thoughts on 24 at the Mid-season Mark

Did you notice that this year, they don't seem to be spending much time at CTU--Jack has only been there once so far, and Chloe has barely been seen at all. Maybe they started to realize how much mayhem had been taking place over the past 5 seasons --sabotage, explosions, nerve gas, murder, mole after mole, traitor after traitor --in a building that is supposed to be secure!

Now anytime they have needed to shake up a CTU character, they have had to send them out of the building --Milo getting shot up and Morris getting drilled. That means characters stuck in CTU like Bill and Nadia haven't had much to do.. while all the usual mayhem is now happening in the underground White House--an even less secure location, apparently!

What the hell happened with the Philip Bauer plot thread? One minute he's about to off his kid, the next he has disappeared into thin air! Think the writers wrote themselves into a corner, or is this all part of a big plan to turn papa Bauer good? And them swapping out arabs for Russians smells like a cop-out to me! Was this planned from the beginning?...I'll admit, with Hamri-Al Assad dead, I'm having trouble predicting where this is going... is the Russian general now the big bad, and Fayed just a secondary baddie? Sure looks that way...

So many questions...

Now they have Ricky Shroeder joining the cast as a younger, less haggard Bauer Jr... Will he be forced to sacrifice a limb like Chase, the last Bauer-in-training?

Will Jack Bauer be indicted for war crimes at The Hague at some point?

...How did Jack's Chinese-prison-beard make its way onto Logan's face in a mere 10 hours It must have been travelling at an incredible rate of speed across Los Angeles County!

...and will the folks at Almeida is God eventually get over the death of Tony?

I for one, look forward to what the rest of the season has in store.

I understand Henry Winkler is guest starring in an upcoming episode, and that his sub plot will involve waterskis, oddly enough...

Aries Spears

Uncle L, Snoop, DMX, and Young Hov, in two minutes:

embed removed... was screwing up my template

Heritage

Remember those Heritage Minute vignettes on CBC? I don't recall having seen one for a while, but some of the better ones still stand out in my mind: The frenzied pace and almost unbearable tension of the Halifax explosion vignette. That one had a real sense of doom and significance. Or the beautifully shot encounter between Cartier and an aboriginal chief and his retinue, and the resulting miscommunication that led to the name of our country being a word for "village". Then there's the one which closes with Jean Nicolet gazes upon the "Great Water" in wonder, thinking he has found the path to China, as the narrator informs us that he had just discovered Lake Michigan-- a reminder to Canadians that so much of this continent, and not just Canada, was charted and explored by the functionaries and religious men of New France.

Perhaps one of the more poignant ones was the one that takes place on Juno Beach, where a young trumpet player entertains his buddies amidst the wreckage of war while planes roar overhead. It's only at the end of the minute that we discover that the young trumpet player is a broadcaster and local personality familiar to anyone who ever lived in Toronto over the past 60 years or so, the "Mayor of Little Italy" Johnny Lombardi.

It's worth revisiting some of these heritage minutes, just to refresh your Canadian pride, and remind yourself of what a fascinating history we have.


The origin of Winnie the Pooh