DEFIANT to the last,

hostage "died like a hero."

A Former Baker Shows Terrorist Scum the Meaning of Bravery

Here's hoping I meet my end as well as Fabrizio did.

From Today's National Post:

PM salutes those who stormed Norway's beaches

Anne Dawson

CFB GAGETOWN, N.B. - Paul Martin rewrote Canadian military history yesterday when he said twice that the liberation of Europe began in 1944 with the invasion of Norway. He meant to say the invasion of Normandy.
"Sixty years ago, Canadians were working alongside their British and American allies planning for the invasion of Norway and the liberation of Europe," Mr. Martin said in a speech to 350 soldiers at this training base outside Fredericton.
A few minutes later he repeated the gaffe.
"Today, it is every bit as important that Canada step forward - just as we did during the invasion of Norway," he said before announcing a series of military spending plans.
Norway is roughly 1,300 kilometres northeast of Normandy, where on June 6, 1944, soldiers from across Canada stormed Juno Beach.
No one in the audience acknowledged the mistake, though Mr. Martin's aides whispered among themselves when they picked up on it.
The blunder is reminiscent of the time former defence minister John McCallum confused the site of Canada's First World War victory at Vimy Ridge with the city of Vichy, capital of the Nazi puppet regime in occupied France during the Second World War.
At the time, Mr. McCallum brushed off the error as a "typing mistake."
When Mr. Martin took power last December, he demoted Mr. McCallum to Minister of Veteran Affairs.

...In Paul Martin's head, this makes sense! He thinks Scandinavians are invading our coastline NOW because 60 years ago we invaded theirs!

Bachelor Update: Episode 2

This Jesse guy is already starting to piss me off. I was watching Ottawa lay a pasting on the Leafs, so I missed the first 20 minutes of the show. What do I see when I finally tune in? Jesse and Trish the leggy model, eating on some stage, apparently after some play or something. Trish stares at Jesse with her dull cow eyes, furrows her brow, and says something about not wanting kids. Jesse, tell me that this girl was not your choice your first date. Dude, you are killing me.

Cut to a montage of Trish saying some incredibly obnoxious and borderline offensive things to the other girls ("My mother taught me to be a golddigger"), cut to trish eating Jesse's face in the back of the limo, cut to me losing my lunch. This truly is a woman of little substance. I loathe her already. I need to recover. Back to the hockey game for a bit.

After the break, Jesse goes on a group date...one of the ladies, Suzie, catches a pass. Good for her! Following the pickup game, Jesse sits down for supper and inserts his foot into his mouth as an appetizer. Sometimes, too much truth is a bad thing. Jesse, the ladies don't want to hear about your countless one-night stands, "tired of waking up next to a stranger, eh?" Some raised eyebrows around the table. Yeah, they get it QB boy, you are a stud.

Every guy should have a devious female friend to spy on potential mates for him... Aha! The spy was the championship swimmer girl!!! I knew it! She speaks to our hero about Trish... clueless boy has a look of shock on his face. Trish - high maintenance? Say it aint so! Now I'm the one furrowing my brow.

Back at the house, one of the girls, Tara, calls him on his player ways... Jesse spouts some rubbish... Tara apparently buys it, for now. My favourtie girl of the bunch, Kristy the med student from Michigan drops a bomb on our boy and asks Jesse not to give her a rose. What a classy woman! Jesse tells us he is upset... pal, you have no idea. You just lost an A-lister, my man.

Meanwhile, Ottawa beats Toronto, and all is right with the world.

The rose ceremony: Blah blah blah... some crap about trust and challenge from our guy. Let the bloodletting begin: Katie, the girl who nearly got the boot last week but got through on a technicality, gets the first rose this time. Confirming my suspicion that he is too stupid to listen to his best friend, Jesse gives Trish a rose... and crazy-eyed Karen too? This guy just doesn't seem to have a clue. My brow is now permanently furrowed. Jean Marie looks like she is ready to eat tinfoil and shit bullets.

Next week Jesse is captivated by Trish's charms so his lady friend bitch slaps some sense into him... or something like that... and this show started off looking so promising....

Let the downward spiral continue.

I was reading some of the vitriol spewed over Alfonso Gagliano's testimony in the adscam controversy. The guy may be a crook, but reading some of the posts where people speculate over his possible ties to organized crime HERE, I wanted to laugh out loud.... I mean, COME ON. Do you honestly think that someone like Vito Rizzuto would have anything to do with a mezzo-fanook like Gagliano? Does THIS look like the face of a wiseguy?

MEMO TO HABS FANS:

IT WAS IN.

DEAL WITH IT.

Apparently, the Department of Foreign Affairs is hiring former adult film stars as ambassadors to Middle Eastern States. This story on Fadi Fadel reveals the ugly truth! Dirk Diggler's real life counterpart is attempting to secure hostage Fadi Fadel's release. Mr. Fadel is an unlucky Syrian-born Canadian Aid worker who had the temerity to go to Iraq to help kids and was found guilty of looking like an Israeli by the Mujahedeen Brigades, who are this season's Saddam Fedayeen (Just like Sadr may end up being this week's Ahmed Yassin, if he doesnt keep his eyes peeled).

But back to the stunning revelation!... can we really be surprised that Foreign Affairs has a former seventies porn legend working for them? This wouldn't be the first time a LOWLIFE worked for Foreign Affairs, right?

First pre-emptive answer to an obvious question: Vis Comica is latin for "sense of humour", which is something I hope that anyone visiting this blog will have...

Today, the blog goes public. I realize this opens me up to the scrutiny of both friends and random visitors, but I'm ready for it. Feel free to mock my lousy syntax and ham-handed writing style... send blog-related hate mail and plaudits to

swompdonkey@hotmail.com

Those of you who know me, know where else to reach me. Friends, welcome. Critics, do your worst! I look forward to the backlash.