Iowahawk does Homer. The whole epic poem is pretty funny (featuring Hildusa the Gorgon and King Chimpos), but my favourite part is at the end:
What now?” said Obamacles, irked at Oracle’s salty impertinence and the interruption of his famous pop ‘n’ lock. “For I have conquered all, and there is no challenger left in all the Beltway.”
The Oracle spoke out from the depths of the guacamole:
“I bid thee welcome to the White House
where your true test now begins:
Markets deaf to happy buzzwords
Blind to Shepard Fairey’s art,
Heeding laws of economics,
Not the wishful laws of man;
A world of of evil filled with monsters,
who are unmoved by flowery talk,
Invulnerable to race cards
or leftwing blogger insults,
Who Hope for Change in megatons.
Do not despair! For look before you,
The noble army who brought you here:
Thespians and hiphop moguls,
Graphic artists, hipster twats,
The academic scribes of Athens,
basic cable sycophants.
These are the arrows in your quiver,
for the coming epic tests;
Use them well, but first remember:
They’re waiting on those magic tricks.
Good luck with that, well-spoken hero,
I think I’ll grab a snack and watch.”
When things get tough, it is comforting to know that the administration will have Keith Olberman, P. Diddy snd Ashton Kutcher onside, right?
