Swompdonkey

Guest blogger feature: Charmsley Brayington's Carnival of Bile

Hey folks, ya know, alot of people say it's important to count your blessings.

I'm not one of them. I say it is more important to count other people's misfortunes. Lets face it, sometimes blessings are few and far between in this life. But darn it if schadenfreude don't feel good sometimes. Honestly... when somebody gets what's coming to 'em, how many of us can deny that we don't breath a sigh of relief and think "better them than me"?

So in that spirit, I give you today's list of unfortunates. Let us ponder the vagaries of fate that delivered them such powerful boots to the nutsack:


1. Joey Delissio


2. The Zarkman


3. Ambassador Mike "Why Now?" Wilson

4. Ralanis (or is it Alanyan?): The Canadian celebrity supercouple that never really took off


5. Senior Cabeza


and remember, if you and a friend are out for a walk in the woods and a bear suddenly appears and begins to chase you, you don't have to outrun the bear... you just have to outrun your friend. Sure there will be self-recrimination later, when you are perched in a tree, and Smokey is off somewhere groaning with indigestion while your pal works his way through his plumbing, but guess who'll be eating bacon and eggs for breakfast tomorrow at the ranger station, and who won't be a stool sample at the foot of a douglas fir? That's right sunshine! It's you.

Til next time, keep your chin up!